When "tough love" is necssary for your kids

Michael Pritchard, Humanist & Child Advocate, gives an example from his life on when and how tough love can be good for kids
When Is "Tough Love" Good For Kids? - Michael Pritchard
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When "tough love" is necssary for your kids

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You know, this isn't about being abusive to your kid when you're telling them. This isn't about being controlling. This is about me being a dad. And right now we have - it's never controlling a kid. It's remotely teaching self-regulation to kids. Good coaches know it. You don't raise a young man by shame and humiliation. That's not how it's done. And you don't raise them to doubt themselves and be afraid. And you don't control them so that they are complacent or compliant to you. You teach them how to be a human being. And sometimes it takes tough talk. And sometimes we yell at them. And I hear people say, oh no, you can't yell at kids. Well I had a bunch of young kids that I raised in my home. And every one of them came back to me and said, you know what Mr. Pritchard? You were the only one that yelled at us. You were the only one who took us to account. You were the only one that made us responsible for our actions. And you yelled at us. And you threatened us. But you never touched us. I never touched my kids. Never had to. And when the other two went around, and all the other kids, they said, I never wanted that speech dad. I never wanted that speech. I never wanted you to be ashamed of me. I never wanted you to feel bad that you had had me in your home. That is, you know, there's the flippant side of saying, look, get your poop in a group. Or go. But what I do, very quietly, very subtly, but ever so tenaciously, teach them to lead themselves.

Michael Pritchard, Humanist & Child Advocate, gives an example from his life on when and how tough love can be good for kids

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Michael Pritchard

Humanist & Child Advocate

Michael Pritchard is a nationally acclaimed keynote speaker praised by the Wall Street Journal, CNN and Time for his ability to use humor to inspire and educate his audiences on communication skills. Michael Pritchard is a big guy with a warm heart who as one student described him, “truly walks as he talks.”

He began his career on both the comedy stage and as a juvenile counselor in San Francisco’s Youth Guidance Center. In 1980, Michael Pritchard won first place in the San Francisco International Stand Up Comedy Competition as well as winning the prestigious California Probation Officer of the Year.

Michael’s offers from Hollywood rolled in including a guest appearance on an Emmy Award winning episode of “Taxi”. His sensational standup comedy billed him with Robin Williams, Jerry Seinfeld, Dana Carvey and Whoopi Goldberg playing venues as Caesar’s, the Comedy Store, Universal Ampitheater and opening for such names as Diana Ross, the Grateful Dead, Kenny Rogers, Mike Mc Donald and Boz Scaggs. But Michael rejected offers from Hollywood to focus on using his comic talents for inspiring youth and adults.

Drawing from his counseling background, Michael Pritchard began using humor to inspire, teach communication skills, anger management, diversity, conflict resolution and overcoming burnout and stress.

His broad base of audience from corporate employees, healthcare workers, government and state officials have honored him with countless standing ovations and numerous awards including: President’s Volunteer Action Award, Commendation - Office of the Attorney General , Paul Harris Fellowship - Rotary International, Toastmaster’s International Speaker, Outstanding Performance - Federal Executive Board , Josephine Duveneck Humanitarian Award and the Key to the City of San Francisco.As a result of his work, Michael Pritchard has been featured on CNN, NBC’s “The Today Show”, “The Tonight Show”, CBS “Sunday Morning” with Charles Kuralt, “Time” magazine and “People” magazine.

His seven educational series for PBS and distribution has been seen by millions and focuses on youth guidance in the areas of violence prevention. “The Power of Choice” “You can Choose”, “Big Changes, Big Choices”.

Forming Heartland Media, he continued with “Red Ribbon Week” and “PeaceTalks” teaching students to make positive choices.“SOS: Saving Our Schools from Hate and Violence”, featured in both Time magazine and on CNN, filmed after the tragic Columbine disaster. His new series: “Lifesteps” builds the social and emotional intelligence in youth and has already received the Parents Choice Award

For his work in promoting nonviolence with youth, Dr. Michael Pritchard was awarded an Honorary Doctorate in Humane Letters from Hartwick University and winning, 2001 Lewis Hine’s Award for Service to Children & Youth Certificate of Appreciation and the 2002 Marin Community Foundations Beryl Buck Fund Award for achievement in Promoting Nonviolence.

As an extension of Heartland Media, he established Heartland Media Foundation building character and emotional intelligence, violence prevention, inciting motivation and leadership in both youth and adults to improve schools and communities. The foundation provides youth guidance programs, including video, print curriculum, and live presentations by Michael Pritchard to aid in schools and communities where the funding is limited.

In the fund raising capacity, Michael Pritchard has help raise millions of dollars by donating his time and talent to events and various charitable organizations including: Boys and Girls Club – Ronald McDonald House –Salvation Army - Jewish Family Services – SF Giants Community Fund – American Heart Association –Women’s Wellness Forum – Special Olympics - CASA Court Appointed Special Advocates - Bread & Roses – Recreation Center for the Handicapped –– DARE –– Texan’s War on Drugs –– Vietnam Vets of America - Guide Dogs for the Blind

More Parenting Videos from Michael Pritchard >
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Transcription: 
You know, this isn't about being abusive to your kid when you're telling them. This isn't about being controlling. This is about me being a dad. And right now we have - it's never controlling a kid. It's remotely teaching self-regulation to kids. Good coaches know it. You don't raise a young man by shame and humiliation. That's not how it's done. And you don't raise them to doubt themselves and be afraid. And you don't control them so that they are complacent or compliant to you. You teach them how to be a human being. And sometimes it takes tough talk. And sometimes we yell at them. And I hear people say, oh no, you can't yell at kids. Well I had a bunch of young kids that I raised in my home. And every one of them came back to me and said, you know what Mr. Pritchard? You were the only one that yelled at us. You were the only one who took us to account. You were the only one that made us responsible for our actions. And you yelled at us. And you threatened us. But you never touched us. I never touched my kids. Never had to. And when the other two went around, and all the other kids, they said, I never wanted that speech dad. I never wanted that speech. I never wanted you to be ashamed of me. I never wanted you to feel bad that you had had me in your home. That is, you know, there's the flippant side of saying, look, get your poop in a group. Or go. But what I do, very quietly, very subtly, but ever so tenaciously, teach them to lead themselves.