Negative peer pressure around adolescents in teen years is a profound thing that we confront as parents. There’s a very, very interesting study done very recently that showed the number one variable to contributes to our young boys and girls being able to stand in their opinions is by working this stuff out with their parents. Unfortunately, for us as parents, it means we need to be willing to argue with our kids. When our kids ask us why I can’t do that, sit down with them and tell them exactly your thinking. “I’m not okay with you doing this, because I don’t trust you. Here is the 7 reasons why I don’t and I really want to. Here is what I would need to see.” But, if you’re going to be willing to argue with your kids – and you need to – you also need to be willing to change your opinions when their arguments make sense. “Why can’t I go to bed at 9 o’clock? I get up every single morning and I’m ready to go to school. I don’t give you a hard time and I’m in the car before you are.” It’s time to change their bedtime. You want to allow them to work on their critical thinking skills, so that their opinions are well thought out. “Because my mom and dad said so,” will never stop a kid from smoking a joint. He’s going to have to be able to have that internally based value system and he’s going to have to work it out with you.