Feeling confused after infant loss
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I think the biggest misconception about infant loss – whether it’s late term or a stillbirth, or shortly after birth – is just that because you didn’t have a lifetime with this child, that it doesn’t hurt as much, or that you’re not going to grieve it in the way that you would another child.
I’ve never lost a child that I was able to raise for any amount of time, so I don’t know. But I do know that the son that I had to say good-bye too much too soon, I carried. I carried him for months. I named him. I talked to him. I planned a nursery for him. And when I had to deliver him and hold him with no heartbeat and no smile and no open eyes that… I grieved him as much as I can imagine I would grieve if I lost my 3-year-old or my 1-year-old. He was my baby and I loved him.
So if you know someone who has gone through it, or if you’re going through it, just please, remember, they were a child. They were loved by their mom and dad so much and that should be treated as such.
Watch Monica Gregory's video on Feeling confused after infant loss...
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Monica GregoryMom
Monica Gregory is 30-something stay-at-home-mom whose journey to motherhood has been anything but smooth. Seven pregnancies, two chemical pregnancies, one twin miscarriage, one VBAC stillbirth, two C-sections, and a total of 11 months on bedrest don't make her an expert on pregnancy or parenting, but they do make her passionate about her role as mother. Before relocating from Ohio to Nashville, TN, for her husband's job, Monica was a commercial insurance agent. Today, she spends her days with Seth, three, Erin, one, and new baby James, sweeping up graham crackers, playing trains, blogging and cooking...all to the strains of Nick, Jr. in the background.
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