Why twins should spend time apart

Joan Friedman, PhD Psychologist & Twin Expert, explains why it is important for twins to spend time apart when they are infants in order to help them become accustomed to being alone and to create their own unique identity
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Why twins should spend time apart

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If twins are unaccustomed to time alone with their parent away from their twin, their natural reaction is to cry or protest or be sad. Unfortunately, parents mistake this behavior for the twins being upset about being away from one another. However, that's really not the case. The children are upset because there is a change in a routine and there's a change in habits. There's a bit of time where things need to be stabilized. However, once the new routine is put in place, everyone loves alone time. The parents love it. The children love it. The children and the mothers feel like they really get to know one another in completely new way. Remember, you don't want your twins to be each other's constant companions.

Joan Friedman, PhD Psychologist & Twin Expert, explains why it is important for twins to spend time apart when they are infants in order to help them become accustomed to being alone and to create their own unique identity

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Joan Friedman, PhD

Psychologist & Twin Expert

Dr. Joan A. Friedman is a prominent and well-respected twin expert who shares her passionate views and insights about twins and their emotional needs with twins and their families throughout the world. The fact that she is an identical twin and the mother of five, including fraternal twin sons, makes her ideally suited to this task. Her commitment to twin research and her treatment of twins of all ages demonstrate the breadth and depth of her skills and experience. She conducts ongoing groups for parents of twins and provides consultation on twin related matters such as school placements, developmental discrepancies, and behavioral issues.

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Transcription: 
If twins are unaccustomed to time alone with their parent away from their twin, their natural reaction is to cry or protest or be sad. Unfortunately, parents mistake this behavior for the twins being upset about being away from one another. However, that's really not the case. The children are upset because there is a change in a routine and there's a change in habits. There's a bit of time where things need to be stabilized. However, once the new routine is put in place, everyone loves alone time. The parents love it. The children love it. The children and the mothers feel like they really get to know one another in completely new way. Remember, you don't want your twins to be each other's constant companions.