Each parent has his or her own way of disciplining a child to discourage a behavior. One form of disciplinary action that has become a controversial topic is spanking. Psychologist and author Carol Dweck explains that many parents believe that spanking is a very pointed, dramatic way to teach children what is right and wrong but decades of research has shown it does not work.
Striking a child may only result with a short-term fix instead of permanently rectifying the problem. According to therapist and author Robert Brooks, parents are fooled into thinking spanking is effective because they believe that it makes their child stop the behavior. He explains that what happens is that behavior continues behind the parents´ back. Finding alternate ways of disciplining is beneficial because data is showing that spanking in many ways leads kids to be much angrier.
Though some parents believe in spanking, some experts suggest that it is demonstrating to your child that aggression is a way to solve a problem. According to Marcy Axness, Childhood Development Specialist, spanked toddlers and children grow up to hit their partners and engage in more domestic violence. She explains there is really nothing positive to be gained from spanking. Additionally, spanking is contradictory to teaching a child to respect.
As opposed to spanking, which is an ineffective tool for dealing with discipline, explore alternate ways of teaching right from wrong. According to Child Development Specialist, Gila Brown, a more successful way of disciplining kids is teaching them restitution. Restitution means, that when I've done something hurtful or when I broke something, I make it up to them.
If you find yourself spanking and yelling a lot, step back and maybe seek out help to find more efficient disciplinary techniques. Do what you have to do to make sure that you understand that you are the adult here and there are other ways to get your child to do what you need your child to do. As opposed to spanking, the end product can be a natural and logical consequence. For example, let your child know that their misbehavior will result in something being taken away from them, such as a book, a toy or an electronic.
I just started the restitution method because of Gila Brown's video and I have already seen great things come from it. My son understands a lot better why certain things are wrong and he already has much better manners!
When my kids were little I found that the best way to discipline them was to have them write about what they did, why it was wrong, and what they were going to do to fix it. I found that having them write it out made them think about it more and then making sure they followed through on what they would do to fix it helped them learn how to solve their own problems.
I am totally against spanking. There are much better methods to teach children.