If your daughter wants to have purple hair or dress in sexually provocative ways, you've got two separate issues. Purple hair, great, encourage that. The faster she gets the purple hair, the faster the purple hair will disappear and she's going to learn about herself, her identity, who she is and who she is not. Those types of things; encourage and facilitate. They give her skills and knowledge, self-identity that will be much more successful and happy as an adult. Dressing in a sexually provocative fashion, another issue. First of all, understand the context. They all do it. Secondly, your daughter is dressing for the other girls, not the boys. The compete with each other with the radical, provocative styles. They try to outdo each other. Your daughter is really not thinking about, "I want to have sex with every guy coming down the hallway." She's talking about wanting to impress the other girls coming down the hallway. What do you do? Moms, I'm sure you've tried it already, "You can't look like that." She says, "Mom, your mind is in the gutter. You don't know what you are talking about." This is a job for dad or a significant male role model in the family. Dads, take your daughter to the Starbucks and have a stumbling, stammering, red-faced conversation. Show her your credentials as ex-14 year old male. Let me tell you what goes off in a 14 year old's head, when he sees somebody dressed like this. This is what he is thinking about you. Do you want that kind of attention? Is that really the way you want them thinking about you? Is this some form of power or control? Is this a way of really hurting yourself and not getting what you really want in life? Please think about it. It's really important.