Helping friends who have suffered infant or pregnancy loss
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After my husband and I lost our son, there were a couple of things that really stood out to us as being so helpful when we looked back on that season in our life.
A huge thing was that we had a 2-year-old at that time and Seth still needed attention, he still needed activities and we just did not have the mental or physical reserve to call upon to be the best parents to him at that time. So we had friends that would come alongside and say, “We’re going to run to the park for a couple of hours. Can we take Seth?” And just knowing that someone that we trusted and cared about could just give him some attention for a few hours was huge. It was great, because not only then was he getting some attention, we weren’t feeling guilty for not giving him that attention.
Another great thing were gift cards. A lot of people brought meals and while we appreciated those, sometimes, you just didn’t feel like eating. That’s very common in grief. And then all this wonderful food sat in your freezer and then it got thrown away. So gift cards to either a grocery store or a restaurant that are close to the home were fabulous, because then we could use them as we needed to.
Another great thing, honestly, was somebody coming over to clean my house. After our stillbirth, I actually was given a diagnosis of preeclampsia, which meant I was on bed rest. So I still had a toddler, I still had a husband – laundry needed to be done, floors needed to be cleaned. I couldn’t do it. So to have somebody come over and say, “You stay in bed, here’s the remote, I’m going to go vacuum for you,” it was little, but it meant the world to our family.
View Monica Gregory's video on Helping friends who have suffered infant or pregnancy loss...
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Monica GregoryMom
Monica Gregory is 30-something stay-at-home-mom whose journey to motherhood has been anything but smooth. Seven pregnancies, two chemical pregnancies, one twin miscarriage, one VBAC stillbirth, two C-sections, and a total of 11 months on bedrest don't make her an expert on pregnancy or parenting, but they do make her passionate about her role as mother. Before relocating from Ohio to Nashville, TN, for her husband's job, Monica was a commercial insurance agent. Today, she spends her days with Seth, three, Erin, one, and new baby James, sweeping up graham crackers, playing trains, blogging and cooking...all to the strains of Nick, Jr. in the background.
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