Creating a positive perception of divorce

Rebecca Eberlin PhD Psychologist, explains the importance of parents creating a positive perception of the family during a divorce in order to make the process easier for the kids
Divorce And Children | Creating A Positive Perception Of Divorce
KidsInTheHouse the Ultimate Parenting Resource
Kids in the House Tour

Creating a positive perception of divorce

Comment
112
Like
112
Transcription: 
It's really important for parents to create a positive perception of the family because the reality is the child's probably already having a hard enough time as it is. We want to make sure that there's positive family-esteem so the child can have positive self-esteem, and the way we see that happening is by making sure that kids know it's not their fault and that, most importantly, you love them no matter what. In addition to making sure that your children know that you love them, which I'm sure they already do, we want to help your children find the positives in this really tough situation. Often parents can approach this by finding the good things and by pointing them out to your children, like, "Even though mom and dad aren't together any more, things are going to be more smooth. Things will be happier. You'll have this house and this house." It's about approaching it from the positive side of things. Try and leave the negativity behind you. One thing that I want to make sure parents who are going through a divorce keep in mind is that this is your child's divorce too, and their 50 percent other parent, so keep things on the positive note. Make sure you're saying what's great about their other parent, what's great about the situation, instead of feeding them things that's not so great because they're probably already aware of those. So we want to take a step in the positive direction, which will help our children feel more confident and secure.

Rebecca Eberlin PhD Psychologist, explains the importance of parents creating a positive perception of the family during a divorce in order to make the process easier for the kids

Transcript

Expert Bio

More from Expert

Rebecca Eberlin, PhD

Psychologist

I am a California state licensed psychologist, who specializes in providing evidence-based treatment and assessment to children, adults and families with a variety of emotional, behavioral and developmental challenges.

A proud Wolverine, I graduated from the University of Michigan, Ann Arbor with Bachelor of Arts degrees in Psychology and Political Science. I then returned to California and completed my Doctoral training at Pacific Graduate School of Psychology, an APA accredited pre-doctoral internship at Sharp HealthCare, and a post-doctoral fellowship at the Children’s Health Council.

I relocated to Los Angeles in the summer of 2011 to conduct prevention-focused research at UCLA’s Semel Institute of Neuroscience and Human Behavior at the Global Center for Children and Families. During my time at UCLA, I became the lead psychologist and Director of Services and Operations at the UCLA Family Commons in Santa Monica.

Throughout the course of my career, my research and treatment interests have included working with children, adolescents and adults who struggle with behavioral and emotional challenges, such as depression, anxiety, impulse control disorders, developmental disabilities and other family-based issues. I also conduct parent education seminars that focus on a wide variety of issues including resiliency, stress, relationships, social media and friendship and bullying.

While my primary location is West Los Angeles, I also have offices in Northern California. If you are interested in obtaining coaching or cognitive testing services in the Bay Area, please do not hesitate to contact me.

Please please visit my website to learn more about me, my practice and how therapy can work for you.

More Parenting Videos from Rebecca Eberlin, PhD >
Enter your email to
download & subscribe
to our newsletter